Negation

Bandler and Grinder (1981, pg 67), "No single pattern that I know of gets in the way of communication more often than using negation. Negation only exists in language and does not exist in experience". This has to do with the inability of our minds to process negatives, such as this "do not think about that most wonderful night, walking hand in hand under the starlit sky". The first thing the mind does is think about what it has been asked not to do, in order to understand what it is not supposed to do.

The tendency is to process the "don't" as a command. Take notice of the following statements;
"Don't forget to close the door", as apposed to "remember to close the door", or
"Of course you can't do that now", as opposed to "do that now".

Another example might be that of, opposition of opposites such as;
"You will, will you not?"
In the above statement, the "not" balances the positive "you will" and gives the listener a way to resist which they really cannot resist. In other words, resistance is by-passed by enlisting questioning and doubt.

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